Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
that is very illegal...i love you.
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