mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I have fence marks all over my body
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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