My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize