I wish you could order shots online.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
