i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I faked an abortion last night.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
