her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
