In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Randomize
