Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Randomize
