On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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