They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize