ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Randomize
