so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
