I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Randomize
