This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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