I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
