im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize
