I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Randomize
