I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize
