so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Randomize
