Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I deserve this hangover.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
