chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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