you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
