I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
