Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
