Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
