She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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