If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
