she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Randomize
