Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
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