We're facebook friends in real life
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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