Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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