it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
