Well douche your snatch and let's go!
there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
MIDGETS
????
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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