if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
