i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
