Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
