Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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