You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
