Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
