I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Randomize
