How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
