So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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