I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
he wants to bone in the snuggie
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
