Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
