so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Randomize