i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
