I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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