office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
