I think I just saw someone hide a body.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
not ubering you a puppy
Randomize
