The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Its about making memories worth repressing
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
