I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
